This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Randomize