Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
