remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Randomize
