This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize