The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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