handjob tips. give me some.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
