I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize