I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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