Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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