Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize
