you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Randomize
