i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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