Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
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