we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't judge my taste in strippers
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize