Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
