Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
