your thong is hanging out like whoa
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
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