I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I'm like, not good at living.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set