Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
