She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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