Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
there was a trapeze. enough said
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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