First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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