Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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