Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
