Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
