you guys were way drunker than both of me
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
