my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
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