Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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