worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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