It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
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