Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
it hurts more in the daytime
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
