how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Randomize
