I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
