i jhust puked up my retainher.
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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