I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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