i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
