just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I need to align my fucking chakras
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
