Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
