at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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