I think I am morally bankrupt
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
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Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
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Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Never let your siblings swipe right.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
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