She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
