I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
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