im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
well I can't set my house on fire every night
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
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