Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
