So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Four minutes until I can fart!
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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