Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
