Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
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