I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
I cut my penus on the lid.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
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