I have demons in me.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Randomize
