her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
