Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
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