In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize